Thursday, October 3, 2013

"Fort Knox" or "I Fake Laugh So Often at Your Lame Jokes That I Have Forgotten What My Real Laugh Sounds Like."

We keep our front door locked at my office. I have to speak to any guests over the intercom before I buzz them in. As a certain gentleman came through the doors this afternoon, he exclaimed, "Man! It's like Fort Knox in here!" and then he looked at me with anticipation, waiting for me to clutch my stomach and guffaw at his hilarious joke. I obliged and threw my head back and with joy and amusement at our comedic guest. But, inside I raged with frusteration and anger because: That joke is not funny. It is in fact, quite lame. Perhaps it made me smirk the first, second, and third time I heard it. But, I have been with this company for over two years now and I hear that joke by at 80%of those who enter. Of course, these people are unaware of that, and I am sure that they are just trying to brighten the lonely receptionist's day with an original "ha-ha!". But people! Not to sound dramatic, but I would rather be stabbed in the eye with a fork than hear your stupid joke. But, I could never respond thusly for it would be quite impolite. These people do not know that they are repeating the same sentence of thousands before them. I want to scream everytime I hear it, but I can't because I am not angry at them in particular. I am angry at the accumulation of well-meaning, unfunny people's lame sense of humor. And, what can I do with that frustration except to suck it up and laugh until my sides hurt for their sake. But, know that it pains me to do so.

1 comment:

  1. With a very straight need to will also need to submit to a search of your person. And when you see the panic or frustration...say Gottcha---see if they laugh...LOL! You could also do a come back that makes no sense and then laugh hysterically. Something like ---well you should see the cheese in here, or diffuse it before it happens. "I know it may seem like Fort Knox in here but...." Then they have nothing to say.

    Ok ok I know none of that is really helpful...I was just being on your side. It must be annoying.

    How about "if I had a dollar for every time I heard that joke I'd be rich" then nod toward a jar with a $1 sign on it. (might as well make some money at

    What about---"while I would normally find that boss is really sensitive about Fort Knox...he won't say why so we don't bring it up." (you will probably be saving people inside from the same lame joke and they will love you!)

    Hang up a map with a red circle around where you are and where Fort Knox is....then a BIG sign that says THIS IS NOT FORT KNOX!

    Hang in there. Even if you can't do these things. Think up a fun list of things you would like to do.....then imagine those and the laugh or smile might come a bit easier and not at the expense of your sanity!